The Heart of the Soul
by Raven Carmichael
Summary: Kagome Higurashi has had enough of living a dull, boring life. Can she find paradise or is she doomed to live in a grey, lonely world forever? One shot.


_Walk in as though it was an ordinary travel agency_,the stranger I'd met had told me. _Ask a few questions-about a trip you are planning, a vacation, or something like that. Then hint about The Folder, tread cautiously, whatever you do, don't mention it directly, wait until he brings it up himself. If he doesn't, you might as well give up and forget it...because you will never get to see it ever again..._

I played and re-played this conversation in my mind over and I felt like a fool, listening to some stranger rambling on and on about The Folder; but I'm still searching the storefronts for the street number I had memorized. It was noon in the city of Katsuya,Japan, the weather's rainy and miserable. The world was real and disappointing; and this was hopeless.

_Anyway_, I thought, _who am I to see The Folder, even if one existed? _I could see myself telling the travel agent,"My name is Kagome Higurashi. I'm a young woman who works in a big office building, a secretary. I don't like the job, I don't make much money; and I never will. I've lived in Japan for more than four years and haven't many friends. I watch more movies than I want to; and I'm tired of meals alone at home. I possess ordinary abilities, appearance and judgment. Do I qualify?" The mere contemplation of the entire scene brought shivers up my just doesn't seem like the kind of thing that one says to a travel agent.

After what seems like a millennia of walking through the rainy weather, I finally spotted the was an old office building that has worn out over the years and the place looked like an outdated joke; but I suppose it fits. I pushed through the glass doors of the building and into a tiny lobby. On the little wall directory there was a list with twenty names. I found "Starchaser Travel Agency" under the seventh floor plaque; I then pressed the button to summon the elevator and rode upstairs. While I was in the elevator I thought to myself, _this is is insane._

A few minutes later, I have arrived at the designated floor. The offices up here are bright and clean, other than the rusty look of the exterior. I then found the door labeled "Starchaser Travel Agency", I reached for the knob, opened the door; and stepped inside. When I walked in, I saw a tall, silver-haired man standing behind the counter. He had a telephone at his ear. He glanced up and nodded to beckon me to come closer, and I felt my heart pounding furiously against my chest. Yes, he was the man alright, the stranger had described him to me and it fits perfectly! Standing before him now, I waited, with both hands on the counter.

I looked at my surroundings. It seemed like any ordinary travel agency with posters on the walls and metal drawers filled to the brim with folders. Again, I felt like a fool for coming this far just to get away from the world. "May I be of some assistance?" The tall, silver-haired man asked, smiling at me; and suddenly I was extremely nervous despite my efforts trying to keep my emotions under control. "Ye...yes.I'd like to...to...get away." _You amateur!_ I scolded myself, _don't rush it! If you do, it will cost you and it will impact the rest of your life!_ I examined him closely to see what effect my response had had; but he didn't even flinch or looked at me as if I had gone mad. "Well,there are many places that you can go," he said politely.

From underneath the counter he presented a folder and handed it to my outstretched hands. "Travel to Ancient Egypt" it said in fancy gold lettering across the cover. I looked at it long enough to be polite since it is common courtesy. Then I shook my head. I was afraid to speak, afraid that I'd say the wrong thing. "Perhaps something more peaceful maybe?" He asked, handing me another folder. It said, "Visit the enchanting rainforests of Madagascar".

Then he reached for a third folder as he said,"Australia is nice at this time of year. The ocean is clean and the skies are blue with a few cotton-soft clouds floating here and there. The Great Barrier Reef is astonishing, all the exotic colours that you can possibly imagine." He finished with a kind smile upon his face; but I decided to risk it. "No." I said, shaking my head. "What I'm really looking for is a quiet, serene environment. The perfect environment to live and settle down in... for all eternity." I stared directly into his amber eyes. "I mean... for the rest of my life." He smiled charmingly and spoke, "What are you searching for? What do you wish to obtain?" I held my breath, and then I finally worked up the courage to speak. "Escape." "From what?" He asked, with a confused look across his facial features. "Well..." Now I am rendered speechless, words caught in my throat, unwilling to come out. I stood there, dumbstruck, unable to say or do anything.

Then, after a moment of silence, I finally let it out,all those secrets and desires; I just poured it all out, "I want to get away from this city- from civilization in general, so to speak. From worry. From loneliness. And Fear itself. And the things I read in the newspapers." Then I couldn't stop talking, the words just kept pouring out like a waterfall. "From never doing what I desire or having much fun. From modern life itself- at least the way it is today." I looked directly at him and whispered softly, "I want to get away from the world."

He lowered his transfixing gaze to look into my eyes as if trying to read my every thought and spoke, "Do you like to associate yourself with people? Tell the truth, because I will know if you don't." "No." I finally said. "It isn't easy for me to relax and to be myself and to make new friends." I said, with a hint of a blush coming into my cheeks. He nodded in agreement and smiled. "You know," he said casually, as if nothing bad has happened, "We occasionally get clients in here who appeared to be searching for the kind of mystic paradise that you want. So just as a sort of little joke..." My breath was caught.

This is the moment that I've been waiting for, my chance to see The Folder... "We've printed a little folder. Simply for our own amusement, you understand- and for occasional clients like yourself. You will have to search for it here if you are interested. It's not the sort of thing that we would care to have the entire planet discover its' most ancient and powerful secrets." The silver-haired man said. I whispered, almost silent, "I'm interested." He then handed me a long, thin folder. The colour was the colour of the Night itself. Across the top in silver letters it said, "Journey into the realm of Azarath!" The blazing midnight blue cover was showered with star after sparkling star. Just under the phrase "Azarath" was a star larger and brighter than the surrounding diamonds of the sky, and across the bottom of the breathtaking display on the cover it said, "Azarath, the place where Life is the way it should be..." I then moved on to open the folder, which was beautifully printed. The images looked as if they had come alive.

In one particular image you could see the glistening dew drops on the early morning grass; and it actually looked wet enough to touch. In another, faces of people seemed to be speaking. My attention was then drawn to a much larger image spreading across two pages. You can see the rolling hills, and slopes blanketed with forest, and the colour was enchanting, perfect in everyway imaginable. There were endless rivers and miles of green, majestic trees; and you knew as you stared at that forest-covered valley, that this was the way the Earth itself looked when it was new and untouched. You knew that every stream ran pure and joyful, and if you could breathe in that air, it would be cleaner and sweeter than the air you were breathing now.

Another image showed a group of people on a never ending sandy beach, filled with shells I've never seen before and pebbles of every shape, size and colour. The group of friends were talking, and the sun was as bright as ever before; and you that they liked their work, all of them, whatever it was, as well as their leisure time. I had never seen anything like their faces before. They were ordinary enough in appearance, the people in this picture- of more or less familiar types, of various ages. Yet you knew deep within that these people were happy. You knew that they had been happy, day after day for eternity- and that they always would be, and they knew it.

I wanted to be with them so much I could hardly sustain my inner happiness. I looked up at the man behind the counter and said, "This is...very interesting." "Yes. We've had clients so interested, so carried away, that they refused to talk about anything else." He laughed. "They actually wanted to know rates, details, everything." I nodded to show that I understand and that I agreed with them. "And I suppose that you have worked out a whole story to go with this?" I glanced at the folder in my hand; the place seemed so real that I felt like I was sucked right into that wonderful place called Azarath. "Oh, of course. What would you like to know?" He asked gently.

"These people," I began softly, "What do they do?" I asked out of curiosity. "They work." was the reply, "Everyone does. They simply live their lives doing what their heart desires." He said simply. "And if there isn't anything they really want to do?" He shook his head. "There's always something for everyone that a person really wants to do. It's just that here, there is rarely a time to find out what it is. Life is simple there; and it is peaceful, serene. Distances are small, and people live and work in small communities. They make the most of the things that they use. There is a great deal of visiting and sharing of food and activities of all kinds. There is no pressure to making lots of money, and there's no crime. Every man, woman, and child is a happy person." I looked once again at the folder and turned a page. The homes there seemed simple and pleasant; but are beautiful and comfortable in their own way. You knew that as soon as you looked at them that these houses were home, really home, to the people who lived in them.

"Who are you?" I asked the man standing in front of me, staring straight into his unblinking yet deep amber eyes. "We- that is to say, the people of Azarath, are people like you. Azarath is a planet very much like this one, and we are all the same; but our historical events and development have been quite different from those of planet Earth." He then flashed a dazzling smile, like those you only see in cheap 1970 movies. "Amusing fantasy isn't it?" "Yes, I suppose it is. Where is this Azarath in which you speak of?" I asked out of curiosity "Light years away, by your own measurements." He stated matter-of-factly. "A little hard to get to then, wouldn't it be?" I asked, staring in disbelief.

For a moment he just looked at me. Then he turned toward the window and stared into space for what seemed like forever. "All I can tell you," He said after a while, "Is that we travel through the vast universe in a very special way- a way that takes no time at all." He then smiled once more. "Why, it is possible to draw in a breath here on Earth... and exhale it on Azarath." I leaned across the counter and said, "I like your little joke," then added, "I like it very much, more than I could possibly express to you with just words." I paused, and then finished, "When does it stop being a joke?" For a moment he just observed me. Then he spoke. "Now. If you want it to." _You have to decide right on the spot; do not hesitate, for if you do, your happiness is as good as gone._ The stranger had told me, _because you'll never get another chance, believe me, I know._

There are some people I'd hate never to see again...and this was the world that I was born and raised in. Then I thought about going back to my job, and trudging to my room feeling exhausted and weak, like a tired horse that has grown old with age at the end of an exhausting work day. I then thought of the endless hills of green in the picture and the white, sandy beach glistening in the morning sun. "I'll go." I decided. "If you will have me." I added nervously. "Be sure," he said sharply, his voice a deadly whisper. "Be certain. If you have the least doubt..." "I'm sure." I said, cutting him off mid-sentence. The silver-haired man then opened a drawer under the counter and took out a small, yellow ticket. The printing on it read, "Good for ONE TRIP TO AZARATH. One way only."

He then put the ticket on the counter and pushed it towards me. "Ah...how much do I have to pay for ticket?" I asked, reaching for my pocketbook. "Whatever you've got with you." He smiled, "You won't be needing money anymore, and we can use it here for office costs." He said simply. "I don't have much," I said, feeling embarrassed. "That doesn't matter." He reassured me. He then stamped the ticket and handed it to me. It said, "Good this day only." Followed by the departure date. I put 1362.20 yen on the counter, a thousand-dollar bill, three one-hundred dollar bills, six tens, two ones and twenty cents.

"Take this ticket to the Starchaser Express, which is our own train station." The silver-haired man explained. Then he gave me the directions to the station; and I left the travel agency to get to the train station. When I arrived at the station, I discovered that the train station itself was nothing like I have ever seen. It was built with the finest granite stone and the windows looked big enough to reflect sunlight, making it all the more majestic. Once inside, I was once again staring in awe. The floors were made of the whitest marble and the columns supporting the building were carved out of the same marble stone and each was encircled with the traditional Chinese dragon and phoenix with vines blooming with roses that looked real to the touch.

The entire scenery was so beautiful, so enchanting that I almost forgot that I had to catch the train. Feeling panic flowing over me like a deep-sea wave; I quickly arrived at the check-in booth and saw a man who stood behind the counter working on some papers. He then glanced up and saw me as I stepped in; and looked toward my hand for my ticket; and when I showed it to him, he nodded at the last chair in the waiting area. I then walked over and sat down without a word and looked around at the other people who were waiting there in silence, the whole scene looked peaceful and serene. There was a young woman, her hands folded on her lap. There was a young man in a suit, his wife beside him holding their little girl in her lap. Lastly, there was a man of about fifty, his face staring out into the rain. He was wearing very expensive clothes. _He could have been the vice-president of a large bank,_ I thought to myself, and wondered what his ticket has cost. After 20 minutes of waiting, an elegant, and very long in length, midnight blue train with a tinge of black pulled into the station. We then got on board and then the train began to drive away.

During the ride, each of us sat in our seats staring out into space through the rain-splattered windows. I then slowly drifted off to sleep from the soft rocking of the train; and when I awoke we were turning off the main track and onto a secondary track. Then the train started to come to a screeching halt as we were getting closer and closer to our destination. We then arrived at the terminus station which leads to what looked like an old, abandoned barn. _It WAS a barn._ I thought; surprised at the fact that we came all this way just to stop at an old barn. The train conductor walked towards the barn, pulled the big sliding wooden door and stood holding it open as we got off the train and filed into the barn one by one. Then he released it and the big door slid closed of its' own weight. The barn was damp and old and it reeked of manure. The train driver pointed a flashlight beam at an old wooden bench in the middle of the barn. "Sit here, please," he said quietly. "Get your tickets ready." He moved down the line punching each of our tickets.

Then he was at the doors again, sliding it open just wide enough for him to pass through. For a moment we saw him against the night sky. "Good luck," he said with a small smile across his features. "Just wait where you are." He then released the door for the last time and left us in the darkness of the barn. The door slid closed, cutting off the beam of his flashlight. A moment later we heard the train whistle in the distance as the train chugged slowly and sadly away. The dark barn was drowned in silence, except for our steady breathing. Time ticked away the hours of waiting; and I felt the urge to speak to whoever was sitting next to me. Except I didn't quite know what to say, and I began to feel out of place, and a little foolish. I was very aware that I was simply sitting in an old and deserted barn. The seconds passed on like eons and yet it feels like Time itself has slowed down for the better. I started to shift my feet restlessly during the long wait in the old, broken barn.

Presently, I realized that I was getting cold and chilled to the bone. Then it dawned on me, realization fell upon me like a ton of bricks; and I was filled with rage and disappointment. We'd been tricked, cheated out of our hard earned income by our desperate desire to find true happiness! We'd listened to that absurd yet unimaginable fantasy, and now we would sit here until we have been brought back to reality. How could I have been foolish enough to believe in such nonsense and ended up only to be ridiculed! Suddenly I jumped to my feet, and stumbled across the wooden floor. The big barn door was heavier than I thought it would be; but I slid it back. Then I took a running step outside, and turned to shout back to the others to get out while they still have the chance. As I turned, the inside of that barn came to life with light. Through its' dust-covered windows streamed with light of brilliant blue and sunny sky.

Suddenly, the air in my lungs, as I opened my mouth to shout, was sweeter than any air I had ever breathed in my life. Though the dusty window, in less than a blink of an eye, I caught a glimpse of that tree-covered valley, and a patch of sun-drenched beach, then the heavy wooden door slid shut, despite my desperate effort to stop it. I was standing alone in a cold and rain-swept night. It took me four or five seconds to pull the door open again. But that was four or five seconds too late. The barn was empty and dark once more. There was nothing inside but a worn, broken pine bench. There was no one inside now; but I knew where they had gone. They were walking, laughing aloud; in that green forest valley.

I work at a job I don't like; yet I ride to it every day in the skytrain reading the daily newspaper, and the bad news it contains. I live in an apartment that my parents bought me, and on my dresser is a little yellow ticket. Printed on it are the words "Good for ONE TRIP TO AZARATH" and stamped on the back is a date; but the date is long since gone, the ticket was punched and void. I've been back to the Starchaser Travel Agency. The first time, the tall silver-haired gentleman walked up to me and put a thousand-dollar bill, three one-hundred dollar bills, six tens, two ones and twenty cents in front of me. "You left this on the counter the last time you were here." He said gently, looking at me squarely in the eyes. Then he added, "I do not know why." Some customers came in and he turned to greet them. There was nothing for me to do but leave.

Walk in as though it were an ordinary travel agency. Ask a few questions, about a trip you are planning, a vacation, or something like that. Then hint about "The Folder". Do not mention it directly; give him time to offer it himself. If he does, make up your mind, and stick to it! Because you won't ever get a second chance. I know, because I've tried, and tried, and tried...


End file.
